Story Weaver

Day 314…

Anger came to visit me in the middle of the night.

Why are you just farting around, talking about creativity and passion, but not doing a damn thing about it?  he bellowed.

This is hard for me, I babbled.

He wasn’t listening.

I haven’t had enough confidence in my voice, I continued.

Time is running out, he yelled.  When are you actually going to do something?

I wanted him to leave me alone.  Didn’t he know I was working on two pieces?  Couldn’t he give me a little credit for asking for help from Haley yesterday?  Don’t my baby steps count for something?

This morning I wake confused.  Shouldn’t I just be satisfied with where I am?  Can’t I quit trying to be more and just be grateful for where I’ve come?

I wish.  I fight with how I will spend my day.  What will be distractions, what could be inspiration?  How the hell does anyone know?

I sit in the garden with my markers and begin to scribble.  A blue jay watches from six feet away.

Then I move to my computer.  Through the sunroom windows I see a blue ribbon in the dirt (what used to be grass when we used to have rain.)  That was not there last night.  A closer look reveals it had been tied to a balloon.

Is this distraction or inspiration?  I think I’ll try writing a story.

Writing topic:  Is it all story?


2 responses to this post.

  1. I can definitely relate to your writing frustrations. Sometimes, I’ll just stare at my screen, writing half a sentence then deleting it and repeating this over and over again for an hour or so.
    Don’t give up though! When those beautiful muses come to you, start writing immediately and for as long as you can. The more you write, the easier it will be for you.
    Good luck fellow writer and I absolutely congratulate your baby steps!


  2. Posted by Su S on July 2, 2011 at 9:19 pm07

    A dialogue in my head sometimes sounds like that too…


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