Posts Tagged ‘thoughts’

Assessing the Blog

Day 363…

Yesterday I once again spend the morning…a good four hours…in my writing room.  I fill pages in my journal, I write notes to myself on a nearby pad, and I read.  One of my writing teachers, Sean Murphy, calls this velcroing myself to the chair.

This morning I want to do it again.  I’m not sure why.  I uncover at least as many questions as answers.  Enough to scare me off in the past, but for now that seems to be what I want.  Maybe it’s this new found interest in my muse,  my intuition.

I wonder why I am ready to let go of this blog.  To see what else will fill this time?  To go deeper into my own writing?  To allow possible writing projects to become clearer?  I’m not sure, and I want to find out.

Writing this blog every day for a year has been a good experience.  I know that on many levels.  But if I give the experience some distance, what else can I learn?

I have been practicing commitment…sticking to a project or idea, even when I am not sure what I hope to gain from it.   Opening to the possibilities, to something more than I can imagine.  And I want more of that.

Writing topic:  More than I can imagine

OK, Muse, You’ve Got My Attention

Day 362…

Ah, yesterday the entire morning is spent in my writing room.  Allowing my muse to have her way with me.  I’m not avoiding her with busy-ness, I offer no excuses, I just steadily write on…and on.

I only have little clues of what this is about…this abundance of ideas flowing from my pen.  I take a few breaks to read.  A little of Natalie Goldberg’s book Wild Mind and The Paris Wife by Paula McLain…a story of Hadley and Ernest Hemingway.  Even my reading is about writing.

Later when I leave the house, new ideas fire.  Ideas about the ideas I was having earlier.  I need to be with others just to get the Muse to shut up.  But the “others” I am with are writers and storytellers themselves.

And in the night, she visits again.  Why the persistence?  Is it because I am giving in to her?  Has she been like this all along?

Day 362 of this year-long blogging commitment…and school starts this week.  I’m transitioning into a new year, and I’m listening.  Wednesday will be my last blog.  For a while?  Forever?  I don’t know.  I don’t seem to be in charge.

Writing topic:  Giving in

Book Connections

Day 361…

An observation:  As the acupuncturist releases my inner chi energy, I follow her work by cleaning up and decluttering the outer chi, my house.

A book on a table near the Barnes and Noble cafe calls to me the other day.  Not something I think I would be looking for, but obviously something inside me connected.  It would have appealed to my son.

Advice for living well in this world, using quotes from science-fiction and fantasy.  Sacred teachings.

For the quote by Isaac Asimov, “If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn’t brood.  I’d type a little faster.”  the author addresses “being driven by the creative impulse–by the all-encompassing need to take what’s inside and put it out there…

Oh, I can so connect with that thought.

And the book itself, sitting on that table?  Was it patiently waiting for me to “see” it, to take what’s outside and bring it in?

Writing topic:  Books that connect

Love As Feeling

Day 359…

Why is love, the subject of artists and philosophers throughout the ages,  so hard to pin down?  It is not just words or images or specific people and events.  Although words and images and specific people and events certainly seem to trigger “love.”

There was a simple illustrated phrase hanging in our family breakfast room when I was growing up.  A craft made at Vacation Bible School.  “God is Love,” it said, every time we came together for a family meal.

God is Love.  And if God is Love, and we are God’s children, then we, too, are Love.

I like that feeling.

Writing topic:  The feeling of Love

P.S.  False alarm on Melissa’s baby.  But a good trial run for everyone involved.

Change of Plans

Day 358…

So the plan this morning is to finish cleaning my house…I’m so close.  Closets organized, shelves straightened,  curtains washed…Curtains washed!!!  The writing group is meeting here tomorrow night.  Last night I even downloaded The Paris Wife on my NOOK, thinking I might have time to read after I clean.

But when I wake up this morning a message on my phone tells me there could be a change in the plans.  Melissa’s having contractions. Can I come stay with the boys?

Why, of course.

So here I am, ready for the next adventure.  Maybe the house won’t be completely ready for the writers.  Oh, well.   If Melissa’s daughter is about to make her appearance, it will be good enough.  Priorities, you know.

Writing topic:  Changing the plan

Big Thoughts

Day 357…

This morning I have ideas that take me beyond the comfortable routine I am in  now.  I don’t wake with them; they just seem to be unfolding with the day.  I see possibilities…one piece at a time.

Great!  I appreciate the way you allowed my suggestions in the night.

What suggestions?

Where do you think these ideas came from?

Well, they seem to be from experiences I’ve been having for quite some time.

Yeah…you wanna talk about it?

Not yet.  I don’t want my resistance to block this process.

OK…I’m here whenever you need me.

Thanks.

Writing topic:  Possibilities

The Awakening

Day 357…

Writing evening pages is giving me what I wanted…several nights of uninterrupted sleep.  Until last night.

I review the day, noting several experiences with satisfaction…more deep cleaning and decision-making as I make my way through two rooms of my accumulated past, a satisfying session at T’ai Chi, a gratefulness for a day when the temperature did not hit 100.

One thing I do not address, however, is what I will be sharing at Artist Sunday in the morning.  This is a yearly event at the Unitarian church and I had agreed to participate.   Throughout the week I refer to it in my evening pages and every morning I wake with evolving ideas.

Except for last night.  Did I know what I wanted to share?  Maybe.  Did I think the idea had “evolved” enough?  I guess so.

But in the night, between the hours of 12:23 to 3: 57, my muse wakes me up with more ideas. Needless to say, I was not happy.

Listen to this, Laura.

Be quiet.  I want to sleep.  Tell me in the morning.

No, really.  I have this great idea…

I. Want. To. Sleep.

But really.  There’s a clearer way to present your thoughts…without sounding so schoolteacherish…

Great.  Hold on to that thought and tell me later.

Don’t you see…you’re slipping in to lecture mode.

Well, duh.  I’ve been a teacher most of my life…it’s who I am.

I know.  And I respect that.  Hear me out.

On and on we went, her persistence wearing away my resistance.  Yeah, she does have a point.  Well, maybe that is a better presentation.  And then…I don’t remember anything between 4:00 and 6:00…

Writing topic: I can’t shut her up